I have wandered away from this blog for too long. I even forgot my log in! But sometimes the un-contemplated life is the best sort of life. He and I have been living offline and enjoying ourselves thoroughly. S&M is still there underneath everything that we do - we are still very much Owner and Kitten - but the trailblazing newbie fear has left me. Now we just are. We are settled and happy. I like it this way.

So, nothing new to share every few days. Leave a comment to say goodbye, if you'd like. I'll still be around at the e-mail address listed in my profile and maybe I'll return some day. With any luck, things will be calm enough that I won't need to :-)



I mentioned this in my last post, but I'd like to talk a little more about our threesome with our new friend, H. We met her online, but we had talked to a lot of other people online before that and none of them had ever worked out. We had talked about a threesome with another woman for so long that we knew exactly how we wanted it to go, and we weren't willing to settle for an unsatisfactory experience with the wrong person.

We had even recently had a bad experience of our own. I don't want to go into it too deeply and dredge it all up again, but before we met H. we got together with a couple to play and...it did not work out. It caused a lot of tension and (momentary) jealousy between my Owner and I, although we were able to come through it. That experience taught us that we are strong together, strong enough to find the right person to play with, strong enough to weather the tough parts of having a somewhat open relationship. We found H. pretty quickly after that and decided that we needed to believe in our relationship and pursue things with her even though we had been burned recently.

Anyway, we immediately hit it off with H. We had fun e-mail and phone conversations with her, separately and together. The energy was perfect. We all wanted the same things out of the experience, and we loved that she seemed to be open-minded. I especially loved that she was coming to us with no agenda - she truly wanted to be with both of us and I didn't get the feeling that there was going to be any problem with my relationship with my Owner in any way.

The night we finally got together was truly amazing. We had the opportunity to do so many things that I had been fantasizing about for so long. Also? She is a great kisser and great with her tongue. (Oh, and did I mention that she has the most amazing boobs that I have ever seen? *swoon!*) The highlight, though, was watching my Owner fuck her. It was really unexpected for me, but that memory still gives me a thrill every time. Sharing Him with H. was everything that I thought it would be, and more. There's something about the fact that my Owner could control and satisfy both of us that makes Him seem so powerful and so sexy. Just knowing that He could please her in that way, and continue to please me beyond my expectations, makes me feel like such a lucky girl. I am more in awe of Him than ever.

Things have continued to be fun and drama-free with H. since then. We're hoping to get together again soon to do all of the things that we didn't get to do the first time around (and for a repeat of some of the highlights). Mostly importantly, my Owner and I are doing great and we're stronger every day.


I'm here! I'm alive! I've just been out of the blogging mood for so long that it was almost impossible to come back. I'm still not sure if I'm going to be posting here regularly, so please check back when you can.

Things with my Owner are going very well. We have been very close and getting on very well. You know how it is...life is normal, slavery continues! The most interesting development is that we met a lovely young woman and shared an amazing evening with her recently. She is very fun, very spontaneous, very sexy (and very bisexual, if I may say). The three of us had so much fun...I just hope that we all can get together again soon because six hours of playing (six! six whole hours!) was no where near enough.

Hope all is well where you are...I'll be in touch soon.



I have heard some young submissives (and even some insecure doms) worry about the attributes that the best Masters just must have. They mention discipline, internal and external, and rope-tying skills and delicious cruelty. But I think my Master's best attribute is something much more benign but still extremely important - His patience.

I am so grateful that He was so calm, understanding and willing to hold my hand this week, even as I threw an unholy hissy fit. I am thankful that He knows that I get scared and that I blame Him for feeling insecure, and that He loves me and reassures me anyway. I am so grateful that He holds me tight to His chest as I thrash and try to get away, tight until I tire and cling to Him again.

And I am most grateful for the fact that He will discipline me this weekend and put me back in my place. That's where I belong.

Such a Long Time

I haven't written here in a while. Life has intruded a little too much lately. He and I continue on. We learn new things every day.

Our biggest challenge lately - okay, so it's my biggest challenge - is how to do things for which there are no road maps. How to find out who you are when no one is like you. How to form your relationship when you don't think like any other couple you know. Blazing trails has never been my strong suit. I've been a conformist all my life and I've never tried to stand out from the crowd. He's a little different, but I know that He's challenged by our path. We're both so in the dark sometimes.

I hope that, as we continue to find our way, we cling to each other in the dark. We may be alone out there in what we're doing, but at least we're together in finding our way.


"I am your slave," I moaned as I rode Him with my collar around my neck. I didn't think before I said it. I just blurted it out as I felt it.

"Yes, yes you are. You've resisted that label, but that is what you are, Kitten," He reassured me.

I started crying, tears of relief and joy and humiliation, all at the same time. He pulled me close and we moved together. He whispered in my ear: "Slave."